T-shirt The Solipsistic Feline: Ornamental Folk Art Cat T-

Is it a cat? Is it a flower? It is a shirt. It is definitely a shirt. History tells us—or specifically, the New Larousse Encyclopedia of Mythology tells us—that the goddess Freya drove a chariot pulled by two blue cats. But where was the third cat? The history books remain silent! They say nothing! It is a conspiracy of silence! This, my dear consumer, is likely that third cat. The one that refused to pull. The one that sat on the side of the road in the ornamental grass, becoming the ornament itself. It is the cat of pure aesthetics. It does not catch mice; it catches eyes. It does not purr; it vibrates with the stylistic frequency of Eastern European folk motifs—or perhaps it is Scandinavian? Who can say? Geopolitics is a fluidity, but style is an absolute! Why you must possess this garment immediately: The Totem of Comfort: This is not merely cotton; it is a shield against the cold indifference of the universe. It covers the torso. Without it, you are merely a torso in the wind. With it, you are a Patron of the Arts. An Ancient Ward against Boredom: Anthropologists suggest that early humans wore patterns to confuse evil spirits. This folk art design is so intricate, so hypnotically recursive, that it will confuse not only evil spirits but also your boss, your neighbors, and the void itself. The SEO of the Soul: You search for meaning; we offer a cat. It is an equitable exchange. This graphic tee features a high-fidelity print of a stylized, ornamental cat, rendered in the rich, earthy tones of traditional cottagecore craftsmanship. It is perfect for the cat lover who finds regular cats too mobile and demanding. This cat stays still. It waits. It adorns. Buy it. Wear it. Become the protagonist of your own absurdist play. Do not wait for Godot to bring you this shirt; he is not coming. The courier, however, is quite reliable.